Fear Of The Unknown, Or The Day Before My Surgery

Hey there!

I’ve got about 24 hours before I undergo arthroscopic surgery of my shoulder.

Here are a few thoughts on being afraid of the unknown.

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Hope this helps!


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Raw YouTube Captioning

hey there it’s David H Lawrence the 17th
and I am as we speak about 24 hours away
from undergoing arthroscopic surgery and
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little
fearful of what’s gonna happen just cuz
I don’t know what’s gonna happen and I
think human beings are pretty naturally
fearful of things they don’t know or
don’t understand
I’m gonna have surgery on my left
shoulder I’m going to apparently what I
have is a tinge of arthritis I don’t
know what a tinge is it’s a very
clinical medical term I’m sure but I
also have a bone spur that is you know
digging into something and it’s gonna be
shaved down and I also have a partial
tear of a tendon which is going to be
repaired and it’s going to be done
arthroscopically which means they make
two holes on one side of my shoulder and
one hole on the opposite side and they
go in and you know as least invasive as
is humanly possible and they do all the
repairs and stuff they are gonna be
putting me under so general anesthesia
and I’m gonna have a pain pump for some
reason for the first day or so and
they’re gonna remove that after the next
day the good news is I have Betsy is
coming down from where she’s been
working for the past few months and
she’s sacrificing a week of contract
work to take care of me she’s gonna be
able to do some work from here but she’s
also going to be available to help me
and you know I tried to arrange for
in-home nursing care they said I won’t
need it I tried to get an idea of what
I’m gonna be able to take a shower after
the operation they said they don’t know
you know I wish I knew more about this I
do have a very vast medical knowledge
and I gained it all at the University of
Google and I got my advanced degree as
as a doctor from watching several years
worth of episodes of ER so you know I do
I know GSW and that’s not the Golden
State Warriors gunshot wound and a stat
I need that stat what I didn’t want to
do was break the string of these videos
so what I’m planning on doing between
now and tomorrow morning instead of
eating because I have to fast is making
at least a week’s worth of videos on
stuff that I have you know gathered and
assembled and wanted to do and have them
sort of be doled out over that week
until I can be back on camera with maybe
a sling who knows maybe a you know some
sort of crazy getup you know my shirt
cut so that I can you know I’m not
putting pressure on it but I don’t know
I don’t know I think that’s the the
point here is I don’t know I have a fear
of the unknown and I’ve never had major
surgery before I mean I had some minor
surgery when I was a kid and you know I
had a dog bite that I had repaired on my
lip but you know in both those cases it
wasn’t any big deal I mean it would it
you know it was big at the time but now
it’s no big deal and this will not be a
big deal when it gets done so I didn’t
want to break the string and so you may
see a few videos that are going to be
done all in a row rather than you know
on a daily basis and I’ll just let them
play out I’ll let them be released
that’s what I’m trying to say between
now and when I can actually start
shooting those videos again so I’m gonna
try to get at least a week’s worth seven
or so shot so forgive me if you see me
in the same shirt I could go change my
shirt every time but frankly my shoulder
hurts stupid so I hope you forgive me I
hope you are okay with that I still want
to keep the streak going it’s a
challenge that I don’t want to let
something as insignificant as our throw
scopic shoulder surgery to repair a
tendon and to shave down a bone spur
stop and part of that is the
responsibility that I feel to you and
the commitment that I made to both you
and to myself so if you have any
thoughts for me if you’ve been through
this before
or if you have any comments leave them
below this video if you’re on vo to go
go comm if you’re on youtube go over to
vo to go comm that’s where the
conversation is sane and lovely and
you know love to have you over there if
you’d like to join my youtube channel
subscribe to it by clicking on my face
there it’s there’s no face there’s a
subscribe button somewhere below this
video if you want to see the latest
video I’ve done go ahead and click on
that frame there YouTube will play it
for you I’m David H Lawrence – 17 thank
you so much for watching and I’ll talk
to you tomorrow.

21 Responses to Fear Of The Unknown, Or The Day Before My Surgery

  1. John Paxton May 19, 2019 at 8:14 pm #

    I don’t wish to invoke luck, she’s a capricious one, but hope you have the best possible outcome in the shortest possible time.

  2. Ilona May 19, 2019 at 9:13 pm #

    May all go well for you, David! Wishing you a speedy recovery!

  3. Mike Russo May 20, 2019 at 3:28 am #

    I’ve had major surgery several times over my life, and I talk about them in my podcast, “Creative Care Unit”. Unfortunately, weirdness follows me wherever I go, even into the medical bays, but fortunately I talk about it in the podcast. For God’s sake, if you’re nervous about going in now, avoid listening to the show until after you’re in recovery!

    Seriously, David, I think you’ll be fine. Your procedure is considerably less invasive than when my Dad had calcium deposits removed from his shoulder in the early ’70s. You’ll have a minimum of scarring (Dad had what looked like a football stitch on his shoulder) and recovery time will be pretty fast. Just make sure that when you do PT that you do exactly what they tell you, pushing it only when you think you can. Don’t overdo it.

    I don’t know if you’re a faith based life form, but I will keep you & Betsy in my prayers for the foreseeable future. Here’s hoping that all goes well and that you’re back up to speed faster than you can imagine.

  4. Jennifer May 20, 2019 at 6:20 am #

    All the very best David . Enjoy yr videos . Here’s to a speedy recovery!

  5. Karen May 20, 2019 at 6:23 am #

    All the best to you, David! We are rooting for you! Kudos to you for even wanting to try to do the videos! I know you’ll be wise, though, and not overdo it. Do what you can, but please focus on recovery.

  6. Jamie May 20, 2019 at 6:41 am #

    Positive thoughts coming your way David. Best wishes for a great outcome and quick recovery!!

  7. Thomas Kan May 20, 2019 at 6:41 am #

    Hi David,

    Thanks for your videos and commitment to them. There is a fear of the totally unknown, but as you have done it can be alleviated a bit by doing research like you have done. I feel that once you have done that, it is a matter of faith and understanding that once it starts it is out of your control. When I say faith, I don’t mean the religious sense as such, which you would expect from me, but the belief that you are in good hands with the hospital, surgeon, type of surgery you have chosen, because of the research you have done. The faith they are professional and skilled, having done this a million times before. Also that with your support from Betsy and others helping you in the process and knowing you have the tenacity (which we know you do) to pull through any recovery process. This is how I address events that I have partial knowledge and have done as much as I can to understand, but there is still a measure of uncertainty. All the best with the surgery and I have faith that you will up and better in no time! Thank you for your support in my VO endeavours. I will be in LA at the end of July I hope we can catch up in person then when you are all better!

  8. Paula Faye Leinweber May 20, 2019 at 7:25 am #

    David, you will do great! Having had arthroscopic surgery in my abdomen area, I found what everyone says is true, recovery is fairly easy, comparatively speaking. Very cool that they can do that procedure on the shoulder too. I too will be praying for a very speedy recovery for you.

  9. Linda May 20, 2019 at 7:45 am #

    Hey David, Do more of what works. You must have loads of stuff already under your belt, which most of us have never seen. Use that. I know how you feel, wanting to get it all done before IT happens. Perhaps this is a time to let go and live. Smell the Roses as IF. Do that THING. You are so brave to talk about your fear. I feel it. I’ve been there with a lung op (Microscopic too) two years ago. I HUG YOU. I shall sit in my Teahouse and sing to you. Get Well Soon, Namaste. Linda

  10. Lynn Norris May 20, 2019 at 8:12 am #

    No forgiveness necessary – I think it’s awesome that you’re doing these videos at all and that you want to keep that going is so great of you. Best of luck for the surgery, I’m sure that all will go well. My last surgery was a knee surgery and because it was mostly arthroscopic (they did have to make an incision to gather materials from a tendon to replace my ACL) and I found that the icing regimen and PT were enough that I didn’t need a lot of pain meds – only a couple days. I hope that will be true for you as well and that you’ll have a speedy recovery. I appreciate this video also because while I’m not an anxious person by nature, when something important comes along that I don’t perhaps have all the information about, or simply haven’t experienced yet to know it will be ok, I suffer from “fear of the unknown” pretty big time. All I can offer is that it passes (I’m sure you know that) and once you have the experience, you’ll never fear THAT unknown again. All the best – feel better soon! Lynn

  11. Chris Ansoff May 20, 2019 at 8:47 am #

    Sending you tons of quick healing thoughts!

  12. ed waldorph May 20, 2019 at 8:55 am #

    Hey, David!

    You have genuine reason to be concerned, but not afraid. The main concern is the anesthesia.

    Not only does general anesthesia have the highest chance of complications—they say you also lose at least some brain cells while you are under. I should know, I’ve been under several times. There aren’t many left. ;) Rest assured that bad Anesthesiologists go away quickly and those that remain are the best.

    The reason you will have a pain pump is not only that they are slicing through some very large muscles, even though it is a small incision, is not so much the bone spur removal (bones don’t have pain receptors,) but the tendon repair. That is also what will restrict your motion for some time.

    Since you have plenty of brain cells to spare, don’t worry. Just enjoy the joy juice for as long as you need it and don’t try to do too much, too soon.

  13. Joseph Narducci May 20, 2019 at 9:50 am #

    I relate to you big time. I have neck surgery coming up on the 30th myself. Praying everything goes well for you and for speedy recovery.

  14. Mary Zajac May 20, 2019 at 10:04 am #


    Bob and I have had our share of surgeries. I had a biopsy and then a mastectomy as I had breast cancer. I went through chemo and radiation. Bob had a liver transplant in October. He was amazing and only had Tylenol once after the surgery. We are both doing well.

    I don’t think any surgery is insignificant and it is okay to be scared. Believe in your doctors and nurses and those who care for you. It’s never easy but you will get through it. You are so lucky that Betsy will be with you. From personal experience, we know this to be true. Bob was there for me every step of the way as were our son and I for him after his surgery.

    I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.



    PS Do the exercises they tell you to do so you will get your range of motion back.

    Best wishes.


  15. Chris Buckner May 20, 2019 at 1:10 pm #

    I look forward to you telling us all how great your shoulder feels once you’re through recovery. Thanks for the video David.

  16. David Urich May 20, 2019 at 1:49 pm #

    Many well Wishes heading your way! it’s just like you to not let your listeners (fans) down by wanting to make the videos regardless of your surgery. Maybe you can get some acting roles that requires someone recovering from shoulder surgery. Always my best, David

  17. John A O'Hern May 20, 2019 at 2:19 pm #

    Good luck Bucko. You’ll be fine. A little rehab and you’ll be right back in the game!

  18. Patricia Napolitano May 20, 2019 at 2:51 pm #

    Surgery is scary, I know from experience. B
    But I feel you will do just great and that you and your shoulder will feel much better after.

  19. Danielle May 20, 2019 at 8:22 pm #

    Sending healing vibes and thoughts your way and I know I join many other voices in saying so. You are much appreciated in this community so here’s to a speedy recovery!

  20. Stephanie May 21, 2019 at 12:57 pm #

    Sending love and light as well as fast healing and recovery. You are a gift.

  21. Sheila May 23, 2019 at 12:21 pm #

    I am just catching up a little late but I wanted to say I hope you did really well and are recovering quickly and without pain

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